In an article recently published by The Lancet, fat people are causing global warming.
… two scientists write that obese people are disproportionately responsible for high food prices and greenhouse gas emissions because they consume 18% more food energy due to their greater body mass — and require increased quantities of fuel to transport themselves and the food they eat. “Promotion of a normal distribution of BMI would reduce the global demand for, and thus the price of, food,” write the authors, Phil Edwards and Ian Roberts of the evocatively named London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine.
First, then environmentalists will come for the obese. What next? The bald — their shiny heads reflect UV rays back into the atmosphere and contribute to the deterioration of the ozone layer.
All of our crises are always the fault of someone else. We are never culpable for the situations in which we find ourselves.
